what is the future look like? is it tasty?

The past days I had been very angry, basically becuase I was under a lot of stress, and those who knows me knows that i have no patient for the people outside my “security list” that means I dont trust them, I dont like them, and would never want to work with them.

the website I was working on is almost finished: project

While I had made up my mind during these days, studying for graduated school is too much for me, I have a really different perpective on alot of things, that is very hard for me to understand and communicate with them, espeically with the study group, I find these people are alients, and I am the only normal person, but maybe it is opposite. I couldn’t care that much, so i just do whatever they want to do. Hide told me the best thing is to play stupid, I didnt try very hard, it is very easy to be stupid in front of all these people. sometimes I alsmot believe these people exist to make you feel stupid, but its fine.

I am getting older now everyday, I didnt feel that old when i was in Uk acutally when I was hanging out with a bunch of kids under 20, I felt like 15 again, its great. it is so amazing to be in the environment with kids who are very inteilligent, out spoken, and active. when i was in the climate camp, one of this workshop was organized by the anarchist federation, there were like 5 of them, all very young, even too young, I thought they are gonna blow this up, but not really, and its not really out of expection, I was staying with one of the AF kid in a squat, where i debated alot of things with him. fuck, the whole trip in eorope I had never stop talking, it was always debating, and it was great, i feel alive, i feel everything is possible to discuss, ALMOST, expect for the part about privilege. white privilege. So anyway, the workshop host by AF was really great, people were disgussing the issues and debating, exchanging ideas, we agree with each other and disagree with each other. where the battle of love starts.

but here, everytime you try to have a debate, people will tell you “oh come on, you are always picking up a fight” or they are being over “political correct” that carried out no debates. I dont have the time for this.

So i decided the best for me is to leave, I am not “giving up” on this, I just dont consider we have the so called “homeland”, and it leads to nationlism anyway. So i will move after this semester, I dont even worry about my folks anymore, all they want is me to be like them, and i am, they have nothing in their mind but money, i have everything but the money.

So I begin my trip to the world without money after this semester, I think I will arrive philippines first and then discuss about the posibility of Asian anarchist network, and then convince somebody to go with me to indonesia by boat, and maybe Malaysia. And then I will decide if I want to stay in SE asia. If not, my friends in Spain is expecting me, and we are very likely to go to south America together, where the one way ticket cost for 400euros. So we dont have to come back……

what is the future look like? is it tasty?


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